When I was a kid, religion was not really a thing at our house. Mom practiced no faith, and her husband was a non-practicing Christian who had no patience for people who thought anything other than Christianity was "real." We learned about Santa before we learned about God/Jesus. My grandparents took us to church sometimes, but it had no more meaning than a movie or a concert to me. I had a public school teacher who made us pray, and who called me a "heathen" for not knowing the Lord's Prayer so I could say it after the Pledge.

After the big Santa Lie was exposed, I came to understand that sometimes adults will all gang up and tell you the same lie. We were told this was "for fun" but remembering all the threats of NO TOYS IF YOU'RE BAD, it was clear that it was a ploy to manipulate our behavior via threats.
When I was about to enter junior high, Mom decided that we were all going to go to Catholic school and that it was more cost effective to do if we were all Catholic. Me? I was totally into it. I had a ton of issues and wanted to feel safe, like I belonged somewhere, all the usual reasons.

At age 12, I was baptized, had a first communion, then went to confession, then was told to get ready for confirmation. I went to catechism on the weekend to catch up with all the church stuff I missed being a heathen. I joined the choir and eventually convinced my brother to join with me. I became an altar server, because they were just starting to let girls do that. Fish fry, mass, soup kitchen--I was all over it. I wanted very much to be a good Catholic.
But it always felt like pretending. Like Santa. That everyone had gotten together to tell the same lie. Maybe it would have been kinder to call the lie a "hope" because heaven is something we hope for--I don't know how many of us actually believe it's real. I don't.

Some people believe firmly that there's one "God," an actual entity that did the stuff in the Bible and drowned everyone to teach them a lesson and fucked Job over pretty hardcore. Others believe "god" can be found in nature, or everywhere, or inside every person who wants him there. I'm not much for the personification of god. The idea conflicts with every fact we do know about the planet, the universe, and where we come from.

Couple that with the fact that the older I got, the more hateful a lot of Catholicism seemed. The judging of other people was rampant. Hatred of gays, atheists, and dirty homeless people who wanted to sleep in the church...there was contempt everywhere, it seemed. Catholics also had a lot of weird rules that made it to the present day, like no divorce and no birth control. WTF, really? And then all the sex abuse stuff came to light, and kept on coming to light, and there was a shitload of it and it was all horrible. And the Church protected these people up to and including Pope Benedict. I decided that anyone who tithed to the Church was investing in protecting child rapists. I rediscovered wicca and paganism and decided those weren't really right for me either. I sort of gave up on religion, thinking I probably wasn't meant to worship anything or practice any faith with other people. And that was fine.

But then...
The new Pope. Pope Francis.

God damn, I love this guy! He's urging people not to focus on abortion, birth control, homosexuality, and other hangups about other people's sex lives. Instead, he wants us to focus on charity, compassion, empathy, service--you know...the kind of stuff that Jesus fellow was always going on about. Hilariously, big Jesus boosters like Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly are losing their shit over it. That's what I wanted the Church to be when I was a kid. Maybe it can actually become that now.

Pope Francis has the potential to cause the biggest Church upheaval since Martin Luther and his hammer. It shouldn't be that way, but sadly, it has to be. So this Sunday, I'm heading down to St Francis Church to hear mass and see if my local Catholics are in line with the new Pope and his message. Because if I can get in on this wave of spreading compassion and comfort, I'm in!


Hello,

I am considering attending mass at your church this weekend. I have been away from the church for many years. I've been so impressed with Pope Francis that I feel like the church is returning to what I believed it to be when I was a child/teenager.

I'm not sure whether it would be appropriate for me to accept communion because I have been away for so long. I have never been to St Francis before. I was a member of St Mary Magdalene parish in Hazel Park, but haven't been there since my 20's. Is there a particular mass I should attend where new visitors are welcome?

Thank you,

This is the response I got back:

Welcome home, Wednesday!

We have 6 masses on the weekends and you will find we are a welcoming community at any of them. We do not call out a particular welcome to any individuals, but a welcome is included regularly as part of the introduction prior to mass. We also greet one another prior to the opening hymn so feel free to say you are visiting or returning to those you greet around you in the pews.

You are correct in sort of "following your gut" in terms of receiving communion. While we joyfully await your full return, it would not be appropriate to receive until you have also fully reconciled via the Sacrament of Reconciliation. If you need assistance with preparation for this, I can help you.

I usually recommend attending mass a few times before jumping to the Sacrament of Reconciliation. This serves two purposes: one, you get a good sense of what you are entering back into and two, you create a bit of hunger for the Eucharist. Once you then go to Reconciliation and are able to receive, the fullness of communion is that much more significant and not something you have checked off a list. The other thing you would want to consider is registering as a member of the parish; we have an online form (easy and quick) or you may pick up a hard copy in the church.

Please let me know if you would like to meet to discuss how else we as a parish community might facilitate your return to the practice of your faith.

In Christ,
Marty
So far, this seems okay to me. Watch my new "church" tag if you want to follow this adventure.