Been getting a lot of friend requests lately that feature a peeve of mine. I won't post pics as examples because I don't want to embarrass anyone, and because I think you'll all get me on this. But it's the artful, clever ways that fat women (men may do this too, but I don't see it nearly as much on the internets) attempt to hide their double chin. After all, double chin means *gasp* FAT!

There are lots of reasons people do this, many if not most of these have to do with embarrassment at being perceived as fat--with all that entails. They don't want people to see how fat they are, or how fat they've gotten (a girl who teased me mercilessly in school for being fat actually told me this), or my favorite--how fat they LOOK. Apparently they aren't fat, it just looks like they are. I'm as guilty of this as anyone, though I'm trying really hard to stop.
Obviously, the internet being what it is, a person can make and maintain long friendships, or even romantic relationships without other people having any idea what they look or sound like.

When you learn that a person you totally like and respect is say, fat, very skinny, acne-covered, or of a race or gender you weren't aware of--how does that affect your opinion of a person (assuming they haven't outright lied about anything)? Does it? Should it?

I know what people are afraid of. It's the same reason people go on crazy diets and have elective surgeries--because they live in a world where they're told absolutely ANYTHING is better than being fat. I won't bother linking to that famous poll of 5th grade girls who said they'd rather be in a wheelchair than fat. Getting things off your chest is good. Being honest is good. Fighting bigotry, bullying, and shaming is good. Coming Out is good.

So, here's what I propose:

I hear a lot about people who "drop the bombshell" about this or that at Thanksgiving. The whole family is together, so it's the perfect time to let it be known that a family member is gay, pregnant, joining the military, voting Republican, or whatever else they've been neglecting to come clean about.

I propose that we all Come Out as ourselves this holiday season. I move that we post unretouched, unshopped, candid photos of ourselves without any artful cropping of this or that "unflattering" body part. Some of us are fat. We're still smart, articulate, creative, and all the other wonderful things that make us, us. I think people should know that, or be reminded of that, or at the very least, know that not everyone agrees that fat people are ugly, lazy, should be hidden, etc etc etc.

Guess what? People you know in your life see you just as you are. Don't you think it's time everyone did? Even if you're one of those shy types who doesn't actually believe they are beautiful--if you EVER leave the house, you could (and should, IMO) at least embrace the idea that you are NOT too hideous to be seen by sunlight (or a camera flash).

This is not really as articulate as I intended to make it, but if you read my "Fat" tag often, you'll know that I have a ton to say on this topic. Maybe you know a woman or young girl who needs to hear about this and participate. So you know, spread the word.